Be A Strong Muslimah!

Ngeliat berita tentang Marwa El Sherbini yang ditusuk di gedung pengadilan di Jerman saat lagi hamil 3 bulan, di depan suami dan anak balitanya oleh pria yang menghina dia karena mengenakan jilbab, pembunuhan Shaima Alawadi (diduga karena kebencian akan identitasnya sebagai muslim), atau penyiksaan seorang muslimah (awalnya kerudungnya ditarik-tarik, lalu karena dia bilang sedang hamil, ia disiksa hingga keguguran) di Paris.....

Heee, tiba-tiba minder, inget momen pas tiba-tiba di shelter Trans Pakuan dideketin seorang mbak yang 'ramah' terus dikasih buletin mencurigakan berjudul "Sedarlah!" (yang mengandung banyak cuplikan surat-surat dari Injil) dimana saya menciut dan langsung pengen cepet-cepet kabur -_-" Apalagi saya berada di negeri saya sendiri, di kota tempat saya besar! 

I should've been stronger. I learned over these stuffs. ALLAH loves His strong servants more than the weak ones. Strong doesn't always mean that you are supposed to have those muscles, those six packs, and beat everyone who challenge you. No, not at all! (I wouldn't want to have six packs on my abdomen, either :p) Sometimes, strongest people are.... (look at the picture below! :D )

 

Byeeeee :) Assalamu'alaikum!

randomness

Sea of teardrops and laughter.

What a wonderful year.What a great life.

I've been through all the phase that I could never think of. I never thought that I would get to experience this kind of challenging yet amazing high school life.

Suara nyanyian G (well sometimes his voice got too lebay :p), main game2 yang dibuat L saat ga ada guru, teriakan 'ausssss ausssss', kesigapan semua orang untuk balik ke kelas tepat waktu pas mapel B Ind, derik suara kursi saat momen 'turus' dimulai, puisi 'bla bla bla and love' kalau ada yang telat pas b Ind, piket kelas dadakan pas pelajaran B Ind, M yang membagikan folio bergaris miliknya saat mau ulangan fisika, tugas if conditional yang kayaknya will never end, ulangan matematika lab yang bikin stres, suara lengkingan tawa S yang seasonal munculnya di tengah KBM,  OASE, S dan K yang berjilbab setelah OASE :) , shalat dhuha bareng, mentoring, kursi ilang-ilangan (yang ternyata dipake buat main PES sama cowok-cowok), baca berita dengan mike yang suaranya membahana, mengheningkan cipta dengan 4 suara yang berbeda, deadliners, drama domba-domba revolusi (peduli apa??), laptop seseorang terjatuh and everyone shocked, murid baru berinisial L (nice to meet you!), banjir danu pas lagi rame2nya acara SMANSA Day, game QWOP yang bikin si juara olim berinisial I frustasi, ngafalin puisi 'AKU'-nya Chairil Anwar (ada yang salah bait, dia nyebut : aku ini binatang LAJANG lol), SMANSA DAY, MEKAH 2013, PODS, PODSS, Jadi observer, ngurus pendaftaran, visa dan pusing-pusingnya, etc.......

Dunia SMA itu keras, saya tidak menampik hal itu. Apalagi materi pelajarannya. Kalau ulangan, akhir akhir ini, saya bisa lupa sarapan. Biologi adalah salah satu momok terbesar buat saya right now. Entah kenapa nilai bahasa juga mengalami guncangan yang sangat ekstrim. Entahlah. Mungkin saya harus lebih serius (memang), lebih determined (sakali but true), dan lebih pede dalam mewujudkan semua yang ada di list mimpi-mimpi itu. Yang ada di to-do-list harian. Yang masih dalam angan, belum terwujud dalam tinta maupun ketikan.

Kadang saya melamun, memikirkan untuk apa saya hidup. Untuk apa saya sekolah. Untuk apa saya susah-susah mempelajari sejuta rumus dan scientific words yang seakan ga ada habisnya ini. Untuk apa saya berorganisasi. Untuk apa saya sibuk ngerjain tugas sana-sini. Sibuk manggilin orang-orang untuk kumpul kerja. Untuk apa saya belajar hingga lelah. 

Saya jelas belum sampai ke titik terang yang benar benar "full stop", tapi saya percaya bahwa salah satu di antara tujuan itu, adalah untuk membuat hidup ini terasa berharga. Biar terasa perjuangannya. Untuk menanamkan, merasakan esensi perjuangan nabi-nabi yang senantiasa menegakkan ilmu. Mengamalkan firman ALLAH SWT (Iqra'!) Juga untuk menghargai effort orangtua kita yang udah mengeluarkan biaya yang tidak sedikit untuk pendidikan kita, dan peluh yang infinite demi merawat kita. Mereka ingin kita berhasil dunia-akhirat, itu saja cukup bagi mereka. 

Di tahun ini pun, saya merasakan, like really really experience how it feels to be someone who look like a stranger. I mean, saya merasa asing di lingkungan dimana saya tumbuh, saya berkembang, saya berteman, saya belajar. Entah benar atau tidak, kadang kala terasa ada sorot mata sinis, tak jarang ada kata-kata yang tidak mengenakkan yang saya dengar. 

Ya, jelas sedih itu ada. Perasaan berduka ada. Maksud saya, please, gimana sih rasanya, ketika lo itu dikhianati by your own flesh and blood? sama sesama saudara lo? sakit kan? 

Tapi, lagi-lagi, seperti yang A (seorang classmate) katakan, bahwa Islam, nikmat iman, saved us all. "Kalo agama gue bukan Islam, entah gue udah jadi orang macam apa sekarang. Mungkin hidup gue udah acak-acakan, udah ngelakuin maksiat, dsb." 

Dan saya masih sering meminta hal-hal yang bahkan mungkin terlihat remeh di mata orang lain, saya memintanya ke Dia seorang. Kadang malu, kayaknya merasa bahwa I beg too much. Bosen ga ya ALLAH SWT denger all my prayers?

Tapi saya teringat suatu hadist, bahwa "ALLAH SWT ga akan pernah merasa bosan sampai kamu merasa bosan." Ya, jadi, tetap istiqomahlah :)

 “The ultimate measure of a man is not where he stands in moments of comfort and convenience, but where he stands at times of challenge and controversy. The true neighbor will risk his position, his prestige, and even his life for the welfare of others.” -Martin Luther King, Jr.

Di akhir kata, I just wanna say that we've got to be thankful for what we have, sekecil apa pun itu. Nikmat iman yang kadang terlupakan, sebenarnya itu adalah salah satu nikmat terbesar, yang harus selalu disyukuri dan harus kita buktikan bahwa kita berhak untuk terus mendapat nikmat itu, ya kan? :') 

H-5 UKK. I hope that I can achieve the best result, I hope that I would see happiness in my parents' face later on. :) 

Bismillah. 

#UdahPutusinAja

Are you familiar with the title of this posting, #UdahPutusinAja? I bet YOU ARE! hehe #superexcited.

#UdahPutusinAja adalah hashtag yang dipopulerkan oleh Ustad Felix Siauw, seorang mualaf yang hingga kini aktif dalam dunia dakwah. Beliau bahkan telah menerbitkan buku berjudul sama pada Februari kemarin, "Udah Putusin Aja!". Ya, di bulan Februari yang identik dengan sesuatu berinisial 'V' itu.

cover buku Udah Putusin Aja! (google)

Bewew sendiri belum pernah membaca buku itu. Cuma melihat sekilas di musola entah punya siapa, that's it. Cuma melihat sekilas di kelas, ada teman yang memegang buku itu. Dan entah kenapa, Bewew jatuh cinta. Nggak hanya pada bukunya, tapi juga pada keberanian dakwah seorang muslim di tengah carut marutnya kehidupan muslim Indonesia, dimana pacaran bahkan sudah bukan hal asing lagi. Bahkan telah hadir istilah-istilah semacam 'pacaran islami', yang seharusnya nggak ada sama sekali dalam Islam.

aku pacaran untuk berdakwah padanya kok | "ngarang lagi, dakwahmu belum tentu sampai, maksiatmu pasti" #UdahPutusinAja 

berat mutusin | "semakin berat engkau tinggalkan maksiat untuk taat, Allah akan beratkan pahalamu :)" #UdahPutusinAja 

lelaki, coba pikir, senangkah bila engkau menikah lalu ketahui bahwa istrimu mantan ke-7 laki-laki berbeda? #UdahPutusinAja 

wanita, coba pikir, inginkah berkata pada suamimu pasca akad kelak "aku menjaga diriku utuh untukmu, untuk hari ini :)" #UdahPutusinAja 

kasian dia diputusin, aku sayang dia | "putusin itu tanda sayang, kamu minta dia untuk taat sama Tuhannya, betul?" #UdahPutusinAja 

jaman sekarang nggak pacaran itu aneh | “Rasul kata pengikutnya di akhir zaman juga orang2 aneh, berbahagialah dan #UdahPutusinAja

pacaran itu bikin semangat belajar | "semangat belajar maksiat?" #UdahPutusinAja 

Mengharapkan punya pacar yang shaleh/shalehah itu mustahil, karena orang yang shaleh/shalehah itu ga akan pacaran. #UdahPutusinAja

beberapa ilustrasi dari account twitter ilustrator buku 'Udah Putusin Aja!', @benefiko

Dan dakwah 'Udah Putusin Aja' ini banyak menyadarkan Bewew bahwa jalan dakwah kita sebagai muslim itu masih panjang. Masih banyak peer bagi muslim. Masih banyak urgensi bagi kita untuk berbenah dari keterpurukan generasi muslim. Masih banyak tali silaturahim yang harus disambung. Masih banyak umat yang harus kita persatukan agar kelak, kita, muslim, tidak sekadar laksana buih di lautan, yang jumlahnya amat banyak namun saling terpisah satu sama lain.

Tidak. Sungguh tidak. Karena satu yang Bewew yakini, bahwa dakwah itu tidak bisa sendiri-sendiri.

Sunday's Curcol

That beautiful moment when you know that Your Lord has given you many things that you prayed for in the past.

But it seems that some of them (my prayer in the past) are not appropriate and now I'm truly embarassed of it. Well, I'm trying my best to take only the good part of it and throw away all of my inappropriate thoughts of it. Because Allah knows things which are good for me. 

Sometimes I feel like I am up to no good. Like I am wasting lots of my time in this earth just for nothing. Like I am full of sins. It's hard. I know life is hard. But, I believe that Allah will always be there for me, for us, if we are trying our best to get close to Him. Guide us to Jannatul Firdous, Ya Rabb. Amen.

Sometimes you have no shoulder to cry on. But never forget that you always have a ground to put your head and shed your tears on (and pray to Allah).

image courtesy :deelandherphotography.tumblr.com 

And Allah knows best.

Weekly Notes

Done :

• 2 more letters to be given! (out of 20 letters, yay!)
• Holding the first mission of 'orientation' succesfully
• Got to know some of British Accent and Dialects. Omg, I don't even know how Mr. Martin could tell the difference between Irish, Welsh, Yorkshire, Newcastle and normal English accent. (he himself had the Yorkshire accent, which still use Thee and Thou in most of the conversation there)
• Re-study grammar and tenses. Past tense, As if/as though, Conditional if, etc.
• Social acts. 
• Answering a surprising question (Bew, why don't you wear niqab?) from a male classmate at school by a simple yet convincing answer. Alhamdulillah.
• Be cool when a teacher asked me, "Who do you like? A, B, or C (mentioning the name of three leaders, boys, in an extracurricular that I joined)" and I was like, "Mmmmm I like the first treasurer instead!" . (The first treasurer is a girl who is also happenned to be my classmate. And we were just chuckling at each other at that time :D)
• Editing group's photo at the OASE 2013. Wanna see the photo? call me maybe #eh

Postponed :

• memorized all verses of Asy-Syams.
• Giving back a friend's pen.
• Liqo :(
• Giving back a friend's biology notes.

Next projects :

• Both physical and physics exercises (if you know what I mean. Hehehe)
• Study for Physics and electronic skill exam
• Chemistry, biology, history homework.
• Sundanese project : interview about a cultural place.
• Begin to study the seventh chapter of Math and do exercise one.
• Searching about the war in Mali. And why does France is involved? (this is the real version of 'kopong')
• Buy white veils and uniforms. 
• Go to Al Amin with Syl! 
• 2 more letters to be given! (out of 20 letters, yay!)
• Create weekly schedule for DANU MEKAH
• Attend the substitution class for Physics
• Finish the task from the 'leader'.  
• Help the coordinator of ARAFAH with their 'LPJ' and so on...
• Try to read the Physics book for A Level in SMANSA's library. Just try. 
• Gather all the new members of DKM again. 
• Memorize min. 3 verses of Qur'an each day.
• Asking the development of each department. 
• Sending motivational quotes and verses!

Result of This Week's 'Kepo-ing' :

• Found out that someone with the initial M currently studying in ITB. His major is MANAGEMENT --> speaking of which, Management in ITB = most likely to be SBM ITB. I AM SO GOING TO BE PANIC. 
• Found a full scholarship for undergraduates to study in the UK. (and my heart was beating fast. Bulu kuduk berdiri. Siapkah kau, Bew?)
• Found undergraduate scholarship from Singapore (called Singapore Cooperating Program, if I'm not mistaken) and the scholarship won't require us to have 'job contract' in Singapore, we could go home directly once we finish our education there.
• Kim Kardashian's pregnant! #okthisisnotsoimportant
• There is a case where an UK woman who just got back from work whose face was thrown acid by somebody wearing niqab in the night, a very late one (look at dailymail.co.uk). The case looks suspicious, and since in UK there are barely women with niqab that go out alone at night. So I have an instinct that there might be someone, which could be man or woman, and maybe he/she is not even moslem, wearing that niqab and throwing that acid. I have so many speculations over the motives of this case, but I won't say anything since this case hasn't developed yet. But I do feel sorry for the victim, since this far, she doesn't look like she has any problem with anyone. I hope she get better soon.

Lyrics Tributed To Televison

Ku berlari (Bewew) kau terdiam (Acara TV gak mutu) 
Ku menangis (Bewew) kau tersenyum (Acara TV gak mutu) 
Ku berduka (Bewew) kau bahagia (Acara TV gak mutu) 
Ku pergi (Bewew) kau kembali (Acara TV gak mutu) 

Ku coba  meraih mimpi (Bewew)
Kau coba ‘tuk hentikan mimpi (Acara TV gak mutu) 
Memang kita takkan menyatu (Bewew dan Acara TV gak mutu)

Wkwk whatever. Just some stuff from my silly thoughts (again). Oh btw, I'm learning the British Accent right now, my tutor is youtube :p I think I'm gonna choose to learn the London's British Accent. Haha.

Just 8 hours away from OASE (Olah Akhlaq Generasi Emas) 2013 that will take place in Cipayung! Can't wait to participate on it! Bismillah~ Hope all the best for OASE 2013 :) May Allah bless all our activities there, Amen.

my group's logo for OASE :D

Jika...

“Kita kadang merasa lebih benar, lebih baik, lebih tinggi, dan lebih suci dibanding mereka yang kita nasehati.
Hanya mengingatkan kembali kepada diri ini: jika kau merasa besar, periksa hatimu. Mungkin ia sedang bengkak.

Jika kau merasa suci, periksa jiwamu. Mungkin itu putihnya nanah dari luka nurani.

Jika kau merasa tinggi, periksa batinmu. Mungkin ia sedang melayang kehilangan pijakan.

Jika kau merasa wangi, periksa ikhlasmu, mungkin itu asap dari amal shalihmu YANG HANGUS DIBAKAR RIYA’.”


 ― Salim A. Fillah, Dalam Dekapan Ukhuwah

My Silly Thoughts (2nd week of January 2013)

Learn all those subjects with all your heart. Yes, I know that sounds kind of... cliché. But just try, will you?

Oh. And this weird but effective self-advice : If you're feeling alone or useless, try to help the others. No matter how small you think your help is, even just with a smile. Karena kamu tak pernah benar-benar tahu tindakanmu atau senyumanmu yang mana yang bisa membangkitkan semangat orang lain, menginspirasi mereka untuk menjadi lebih baik lagi. 

Lots of people might say that had a crush on someone is okay, and it might bring many positive effects on us. But I personally think that having a crush on someone just make me a silly scaredy-cat who likes to hide everytime I saw that one boy. Ha. Whatever. Alhamdulillah right now I can control my own feelings (Insha Allah...) 

Never lose hope in anything.

Don't judge, no matter how much you really want to do it.

You have to be the leader of yourself. Make choices for your life. Be yourself. Be the best of yourself. 

Now, Allah has lightened [the hardship] for you, and He knows that among you is weakness. So if there are from you one hundred [who are] steadfast, they will overcome two hundred. And if there are among you a thousand, they will overcome two thousand by permission of Allah . And Allah is with the steadfast. (Q.S. Al Anfal [8]: 66)

Sekarang Allah telah meringankan kepadamu dan dia telah mengetahui bahwa padamu ada kelemahan. Maka jika ada diantaramu seratus orang yang sabar, niscaya mereka akan dapat mengalahkan dua ratus orang kafir; dan jika diantaramu ada seribu orang (yang sabar), niscaya mereka akan dapat mengalahkan dua ribu orang, dengan seizin Allah. Dan Allah beserta orang-orang yang sabar. (Q.S. Al Anfal [8]: 66)

Dalam Dekapan Ukhuwah

Seorang kawan bertanya dengan nada mengeluh.

“Di mana keadilan Alloh?”, ujarnya.

“Telah lama aku memohon dan meminta pada-Nya satu hal saja.

Kuiringi semua itu dengan segala ketaatan pada-Nya.

Kujauhi segala larangannya.

Kutegakkan yang wajib.

Kutekuni yang sunnah.

Kutebarkan shodaqoh.

Aku berdiri di waktu malam.

Aku bersujud di kala dhuha.

Aku baca kalam-Nya.

Aku upayakan sepenuh kemampuan mengikut jejak Rosul-Nya.

Tapi hingga kini Alloh belum mewujudkan harapanku itu.

Sama sekali.”

Saya menatapnya iba. Lalu tertunduk sedih.

“Padahal,” lanjutnya sambil kini berkaca-kaca, “Ada teman yang aku tahu ibadahnya berantakan. Wajibnya tak utuh. Sunnahnya tak tersentuh. Akhlaknya kacau. Otaknya kotor. Bicaranya bocor. Tapi begitu dia berkata bahwa dia menginginkan sesuatu, hari berikutnya segalanya telah tersaji. Semua yang dia minta didapatkannya. Di mana keadilan Alloh?”

Rasanya saya punya banyak kata-kata untuk menghakiminya.

Saya bisa saja mengatakan, “Kamu sombong. Kamu bangga diri dengan ibadahmu. Kamu menganggap hina orang lain. Kamu tertipu oleh kebaikanmu sebagaimana Iblis telah terlena! Jangan heran kalau do’amu tidak diijabah. Kesombonganmu telah menghapus segala kebaikan. Nilai dirimu hanya anai-anai beterbangan. Mungkin kawan yang kau rendahkan jauh lebih tinggi kedudukannya di sisi Alloh karena dia merahasiakan amal sholihnya!”

Saya bisa mengucapkan itu semua. Atau banyak kalimat kebenaran lainnya.

Tapi saya sadar.

Ini ujian dalam dekapan ukhuwah.

Maka saya memilih sudut pandang lain yang saya harap lebih bermakna baginya daripada sekedar terinsyafkan tapi sekaligus terluka.

Saya khawatir, luka akan bertahan jauh lebih lama daripada kesadarannya.

Maka saya katakan padanya, “Pernahkah engkau didatangi pengamen?”

“Maksudmu?”

“Ya, pengamen,” lanjut saya seiring senyum. “Pernah?”

“Iya. Pernah.” Wajahnya serius. Matanya menatap saya lekat-lekat.

“Bayangkan jika pengamennya adalah seorang yang berpenampilan seram, bertato, bertindik, dan wajahnya garang mengerikan. Nyanyiannya lebih mirip teriakan yang memekakkan telinga. Suaranya kacau, balau, sengau, parau, sumbang, dan cemprang. Lagunya malah menyakitkan ulu hati, sama sekali tak dapat dinikmati. Apa yang akan kau lakukan?”

“Segera kuberi uang,” jawabnya, “Agar segera berhenti menyanyi dan cepat-cepat pergi.”

“Lalu bagaimana jika pengamen itu bersuara emas, mirip sempurna dengan Ebiet G. Ade atau Sam Bimbo yang kau suka, menyanyi dengan sopan dan penampilannya rapi lagi wangi, apa yang kau lakukan?”

“Ku dengarkan, kunikmati hingga akhir lagu,” dia menjawab sambil memejamkan mata, mungkin membayangkan kemerduan yang dicanduinya itu. “Lalu kuminta dia menyanyikan lagu yang lain lagi. Tambah lagi. Dan lagi.”

Saya tertawa.

Dia tertawa.

“Kau mengerti kan?” tanya saya.

“Bisa saja Alloh juga berlaku begitu pada kita, para hamba-Nya. Jika ada manusia yang fasik, keji, munkar, banyak dosa, dan dibenci-Nya berdo’a memohon pada-Nya, mungkin akan Dia firmankan pada malaikat: “Cepat berikan apa yang dia minta. Aku muak dengan mendengar ocehannya. Aku benci menyimak suaranya. Aku risi mendengar pintanya!”

“Tapi,” saya melanjutkan sambil memastikan dia mencerna setiap kata, “Bila yang menadahkan tangan adalah hamba yang dicintai-Nya, yang giat beribadah, yang rajin bersedekah, yang menyempurnakan wajib dan menegakkan sunnah; maka mungkin saja Alloh akan berfirman pada malaikat-Nya: ‘Tunggu! Tunda dulu apa yang menjadi hajatnya. Sungguh Aku bahagia bila diminta. Dan biarlah hamba-Ku ini terus meminta, terus berdo’a, terus menghiba. Aku menyukai do’a-do’anya. Aku menyukai kata-kata dan tangis isaknya. Aku menyukai khusyu’ dan tunduknya. Aku menyukai puja dan puji yang dilantunkannya. Aku tak ingin dia menjauh dari-Ku setelah mendapat apa yang dia pinta. Aku mencintainya.”

“Oh ya?” matanya berbinar. “Betul demikiankah yang terjadi padaku?”

“Hm… Pastinya, aku tidak tahu,” jawab saya sambil tersenyum. Dia agak terkejut. Segera saya sambung sambil menepuk pundaknya, “Aku hanya ingin kau berbaik sangka.”

Dan dia tersenyum. Alhamdulillah.

***

Dikutip dari Buku 'Dalam Dekapan Ukhuwah' karya Salim A. Fillah. Credits to http://lentingkehidupanku.blogspot.com/2012/06/kutipan-buku-dalam-dekapan-ukhuwah.html

Visa and Hijab

Hi guys. Assalamu'alaikum :) Yes, I know, maybe nowadays I'm not used to write again~ Hahaha. But seriously, it's a HUGE problem. Now I prefer browsing more than writing, and I want to change it, like, now! Because writing is a part of our life that would never disappear, just like reading. From kindergarten until high school, it will always exists, haha :D

O, btw, today's theme is.... SECRET! I made a promise to myself that I won't say a thing about a program that I joined until I've already been the third grader at high school. But, I seriously need to share my thought about this crazy big (little) thing called.... Visa!

So many people, either in blogs or reality keep saying that to make visas that are issued by some countries, muslimah need to expose their ears in their visa's photos, and even their neck. Well, when I know this fact, at first I was like, 'ummm what? I don't wanna do that.'

Then I realized that I'll undergo that phase too, Insha Allah. Making visa. To an embassy that is known to have somewhat kind of strict rules. And my reaction become like, WHAT??

I'm not ignoring the fact that I'm getting nervous. And goosebumps. I'm started to browse really often about that topic : visa and hijab. Almost around 80% of muslimah in Indonesia have to expose their ears for their visa photo. I have no idea until I saw their photo, some only with ciput, the others exposing their ears. I've asked an upperclassmen from other school that is joining the same program as me, and already undergo the visa-making-phase last year, called Kak 'S'. She said that yes, we must expose our ears, in order to prove that we are healthy. In addition, I found an article which tell a story about a famous muslimah writer, Helvy Tiana Rosa (who came to PUTIK last year), who couldn't get her visa (eventhough she was invited by a university in the US to hold a seminar) just because she insisted to wear her hijab in her visa photo.

I think those reasons for exposing ears in visa photo are not logical. And based on my opinion and an Islamic forum at the internet, if muslimah's intention of making visa is not urgent (for example we need to move to other country or else our life will be in danger), then muslimah shouldn't expose their aurahs (body parts which are mustn't be seen by non mahram/boys after a girl reaches adolescence phase), including their ears for the visa photo. I'm a muslimah, and I want my decision to wear hijab, my commitment with Allah SWT, to be respected. Just like the way I respect other muslimah who haven't wore hijab yet.

Speaking of which, based on my browsing results, our visa photo would not only used when we apply for visa. That photo would be seen by airport staff when we arrived in that country. It will also stored in the system owned by the government of a country, and they will still save it into years later. This, is already proven by someone who is applying for visa, and the embassy staff could open their old visa document (including the photo) eventhough the visa was created a long time ago. This is another reason why I don't want to expose my ears, my aurahs.

O Prophet, tell your wives and your daughters and the women of the believers to bring down over themselves [part] of their outer garments. That is more suitable that they will be known and not be abused. And ever is Allah Forgiving and Merciful. (Q.S. Al Ahzab : 59)

I was almost clueless. Hopeless. Tears came streaming down my face. But it's too early to give up. I ain't give up yet. I keep on searching, googling, and I found an article. This article.

The writer of that article, Mrs. Taschan, told her experience when applying visa to US. She said that out of 4 muslimahs that she asks, only one who is wearing full-hijab for her visa photo. It's either subhanallah or astagfirullah, I simply couldn't choose one! I keep reading her article, and Mrs. Taschan, alhamdulillah, stand on her decision to wear hijab for her visa's photo. (lucky her, she already had visa to Germany in which she wore hijab too, so it was like she had more chance to get this US visa) She kept her hijab kind of tight to her head, and the hijab ended right on her hairline. And you know what? She got the visa!

Mrs. Taschan's visa photo.

The other muslimah that insisted wearing hijab for her visa photo is Asyurani. But, at first her photo was not approved by the US embassy staff, but the embassy staff said that : "sekarang memang gak harus memperlihatkan telinga lagi untuk yang berjilbab, tapi dahinya harus keliatan semua. Minimal kerudung itu pas ada di batas hairline (now, the girls that use hijab don't have to expose their ears again, but the chin must be fully-visible. The hijab should be placed at your hairline.)" Then, she re-take her visa photo, still with hijab (but revised), still with ears invisible, and.... she received her visa without any problem alhamdulillah...

I'm all like, whaaaat? Allahu akbar! Then I came to a website of embassy that I will apply visa for, and some rules have been changed. The part about hijab says that ; "Do not wear a hat or head covering that obscures the hair or hairline, unless worn daily for a religious purpose. Your full face must be visible, and the head covering must not cast any shadows on your face."

Conclusion : It's allowed to wear full hijab on almost any kind of visa (even my mom who applied for schengen visa could get her visa eventhough she wore full hijab in her visa photo). Even the official website says so.

Fainna ma'al 'usri yusraa. Inna ma'al usri yusra...
For indeed, with hardship [will be] ease. Indeed, with hardship [will be] ease.
Karena sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan itu ada kemudahan, sesungguhnya sesudah kesulitan itu ada kemudahan.
(Qur'an Surah Ash Sharh/The Relief : 5-6)

Bukan sekadar tren, jilbab adalah identitas sejati Muslimah. Bukan sekadar simbol keagamaan. Ya, jilbab adalah jalan ketakwaan, bukti ketundukkan sebagai hamba Allah SWT. Jilbab adalah pertanda keimanan. (google)

Sesuatu yang diyakini harus diperjuangkan terlebih dahulu. (google)

If you have decided to adhere to your belief, you have to be ready with all the risks that are waiting for you. (Ibu/Mom)

Bismillahirrohmanirrohim. (mohon doanya ya!) I'll be stronger for this da'wah. Because I believe in Allah SWT and all His promise in Qur'an. I believe that there will always be a way out for every problems.


Love,
Bewizta.

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UPDATE (June 25th 2013)
Have I told you that I already got my visa, the US visa? :) Yes, InsyaALLAH it's already made.

I use my photo with full hijab for the visa, and the embassy staff in Jakarta were so nice. They didn't ask about my hijab, my photo, or anything about it (the only question for me was "Where do you wanna go?" and BAM! He gave me the white card. Woo hooo, alhamdulillah.)

The application went well, alhamdulillah. I guess, it's kinda because I was applying visa in order to attend a program which has link to US embassy (it is funded by the US department of state), but it is all happened due to ALLAH's decision. You know, when you believe you can do it, miracles do happen. Kerja "tangan-tangan tak terlihat" itu biasanya akan muncul ketika kamu udah berusaha, udah berdoa dengan sebaik-baiknya.

I was told by everyone I knew (literally, EVERYONE) that it's hard to make it (the visa) if I insist on wearing full hijab. To make it worse, I was applying for SCHOLARSHIP, which usually reccommended visa photo with ears uncovered. The scholarship staff sent me a lot of emails, telling me about the right hijab to wear on the photoshoot, and I was like, running to my mom with a total confused look (and while snobbing too, you know, I got carried away sometimes). My mom told me, 'Well, it's just one of the procedures. Why don't you show your ears for the photo only?'. But I was like 'there's no way I'm doing that'. Not because I was trying to be hardheaded, but due to the fact that hijab is my pride, my obligation as Muslimah, I'm not allowed to show any part of my aurahs except I was in very dangerous situation whereas, for example, I would die if I didn't do that.

Dalam prosesnya, ada yang seolah berbisik "Udah, foto aja lagi. Bener kata kakak-kakaknya tuh, cuma prosedur dan ga akan disebarluaskan."

Tapi setiap saya ngebayangin foto dengan telinga terlihat, yang terlintas di pikiran saya hanyalah, gimana kalau di alam kubur nanti saya ditanya kenapa saya sampai hati membuka jilbab demi urusan duniawi yang tidak emergency banget, padahal saya tau itu kurang baik (sounds lebay, BUT it's true!). Terus seolah terngiang kata-kata radio rodja, "katakan tidak pada kemewahan dunia, kalau kau harus membuka hijabmu!", juga keinget sama surat al ahzab ayat 59 (jleb, jleb, jleb). Dan ada pula kata-kata nasihat dari guru les saya, bahwa "Bez, kamu sudah besar, sudah tau mana keputusan yang terbaik. Sudah tau kewajiban bagi muslimah untuk menutup aurat". Dan lagi, saya kebayang usaha muslimah lain dalam istiqomah berjilbab, misalnya Mbak Helvy Tiana Rosa yang bertahan untuk pake jilbab pas dulu dia UN SMA, padahal dia ga boleh ikut UN kalo pake kerudung, dan dia pun akhirnya nekat ikut UN dengan tetap pakai jilbab dengan tidak sepengetahuan kepala sekolahnya yang melarangnya, dengan hanya mengerjakan soal UN tersebut dalam 15 menit-an! (Bayangin, Mbak Helvy terancam ga lulus, and it means, her whole life is at risk but she didn't even let her hijab loosened!).

Those kind of thoughts have helped me untuk bangkit dari perasaan ga nyaman. Perasaan ga aman karena dari 90 orang yang berangkat dan puluhan diantaranya berjilbab, saya satu-satunya yang tetap bertahan dengan foto with ears covered. Perasaan ga tenang karena banyak yang menyarankan saya untuk "ikuti prosedur saja". Ada yang terang-terangan mengatakan bahwa saat-saat seperti pembuatan visa ini bukanlah saat untuk mempertahankan keyakinan kita (saya tau dia nggak bermaksud benar-benar seperti itu, tapi tetep aja itu mengintimidasi, a lot).

Thank God, ALLAH has guided me to meet such wonderful friends and teachers. Tempat satu-satunya curhat saya itu cuma di lingkaran-lingkaran tercinta di SMANSA. Atau di beberapa sesi les BP bersama MS. Atau malah sama Ninis hehe. But it helps a lot. Makasih banyaaaak :D

Dan di saat-saat terakhir sebelum ke kedutaan, ada tante saya yang nge-bbm bahwa dia dulu ke US, visanya pakai jilbab full, tanpa telinga seinci pun. (and guess what? visanya dibikinin kantor, she didn't even need to go to the embassy at all, and she's not doing any interview at all!)

When I was out of the interview locket, with white card on my hand, I felt like all my efforts, all my worries were finally paid off.

So, once again, don't surrender. Coba dulu. If you never try, you'll never know.