But it seems that some of them (my prayer in the past) are not appropriate and now I'm truly embarassed of it. Well, I'm trying my best to take only the good part of it and throw away all of my inappropriate thoughts of it. Because Allah knows things which are good for me.
Sometimes I feel like I am up to no good. Like I am wasting lots of my time in this earth just for nothing. Like I am full of sins. It's hard. I know life is hard. But, I believe that Allah will always be there for me, for us, if we are trying our best to get close to Him. Guide us to Jannatul Firdous, Ya Rabb. Amen.
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And Allah knows best.