Monday, January 10, 2011

2010 (to remember)

- Glad to have 8B bffs such as Hazrin, Irin, Anza, Anol.

- I promised to make my my parents proud, from now on.

- Start to falling for Atas. And I enjoyed it all the time.

- Joined DKM Al Hadi. It was thrilling though I had so much fun there! And I feel like I gained many Islam Values from this organization. Thanks to Ami, Hazrin, Anza, Alya who were forced me to joined DKM.

- I had so much pressure at school. There were grouping system in my class, and I feel like I am freaking out all the time. But together with some friends, I've already solved that problem. Thanks. And, Atas also helped me A LOT, he was one of my reasons to go to school. I bet he never realized it, but my feelings for him, was the best feelings overall.

- Being active in this blog again after a year vacum, re-designing it, make the first header, started to posting frequently, make the second header... Ah, it feels so nice :D

- It was Apirang's birthday, but I don't say a wish to him. I just give him a status at facebook, and pray for him. I just the way too shy, is it wrong?

- Got the best report ever at the end semester of grade 8. I was so surprised, just like 'wow'.

- Atas going to smansa. Just knowing that made me feel relieved. It means that he is not that far from me, right?

- Umrah. Seeing Ka'bah was the BEST moment of my life. I haven't be a better moslem till now, I'm still on my way to defeat the evil side of myself.

- 14th birthday. Wow, now I'm 14? It just like yesterday that I had my 5th birthday party on kindergarten! Time flies so fast, ya know.

- Atas seems like he knows my feeling (of course, my friends said it out loud at a gatherings which atas invited too) Since then, I stopped my feelings for him. It's not so good. I'm afraid that he will get afraid to me, then he avoiding me. That's the worst thing that could ever happened to me. It's better to stay away. I know, I'm such a loser, but I just can't handle it. I mean, I'd rather to hurt my heart than hurting the others heart. I want Atas's happiness, I want Atas to smile happily. So, just let him find the girl of his dream. (sounds cliche, doesn't it?)

- Met BBM on my mom's gathering. And in a second, I've been crushed for him. That feels good, and I just wanna smile when I remembered that moment. Even just 2 hours, it took many places in my heart. Till now, I still had Deja Vu when passed by Pancoran Statue, because i'm passed Pancoran Statue after met BBM. I felt sad when I passed by that restaurant, when I passed by Pacific Place. Yea, I know Alice Saying, "Nothing's Imposibble, unless you say it is." But this love just feel imposibble to me. Be with BBM, is just a dream. And that dream, wasn't my biggest passion to do in this life.

- Got hitted by a motorcycle. Got my bone broke. That accident made me realized, that our life in this world's just temporarily. Do not love the world so much. We died easily, fastly.

- Caused so many troubles for myself. I DO really learn from all this experience. How to forgiving, how to feel the others feels. That gave me a lesson : You can't always please everyone. So, don't try to be perfect, to be good to everyone. Just be yourself.

- Separated from Apirang, for-EVER. I may not be in smansa, my parents seems to had so much passion to take me to the boarding school. Yes, I didn't say a 'goodbye' to him. What's my right? I'm nothing to him. If we're fated to be together, someday, there will be a chance for us to meet again. Just wait and work hard like Cinderella, then the Prince will come by his self. Simple, isn't it?

- I've been a mean girl for FND, Pelahap, etc. I am so sorry. I didn't mean to be that mean to you. You know, I'm a teenagers. I am not stable, I am a moody person. So, sometimes, I can't control my own feelings. So, sorry.

2010 seems like a very emotional year, right? This year, I admit that I've experienced many problems that made me more mature (though I still act childishly sometimes) 2010 has one conclusion : my love life have always been this bad -__- my prince charming, why you haven't pick me up? I bet your limo is breaking up again *sigh* --> nanaonan

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